Wednesday, April 09, 2008

breath

I am still floating in this whirlwind that my life has become in the last month. The movement of life is pouring all over me and it's damn overwhelming and crisp and fresh as well.
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As Tsiki's 3rd year anniversary becomes closer and closer I find my mind churning it's wheels in making sense how so much can be compacted in three years. I don't mean to sound hokey pokey, but after I dealt with the anger and devastation of losing him, I have always felt that he was whispering in my right ear. In his life he had this gorgeous glow about him and that same glow has smeared itself all over my aura. It was the antiseptic to my sadness, I needed that glow so that I could heal.
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The sky seems like it's in fast forward. The clouds shade my eyes from the blinding blue sky. Sometimes raindrops fall like tears on my face but when I look up again, a crisp wind awakens me. Tsiki's anniversary brings me closer to nature. It was the only way I could learn to breath three years ago. Sun sets and the chimes of trees. Birds on branches and the sound of waves. I need life's rhythms to keep my own.
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As I plan my future with my new gift of love in life, I am sill amazed at all of the events that had to take place so I can be here right now. I find it unfair and heart breaking and I ache for my past, but I also am a very lucky gal to be given another chance to have a future.

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